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Writer's pictureCharles Joseph Albert

IF YOU GIVE A 53 YEAR-OLD ECSTASY


If you give a 53 year-old ecstasy

she will think about her daughter

and start to regret the friction.

She will want a pen and paper

to write a letter of apology.

Then she will want an airplane ticket

and two months off from work

to live in the hotel down the street

from her daughter's family.

She will come over every day

and try to build trust among

the indoctrinated grandchildren.

She will want solid, wooden

puzzles, yarn-based crafts,

and wholesome, artisanal treats.

When the campaign fails,

because she overstepped the bounds

with inappropriate spanking

and she is sent packing,

she will want a return-ticket home.

She may want a stool reserved at the

Bottoms Up bar downtown,

a liberal tab for tequila sunrises,

and her own pole. But don't let her have one.

Cut her tequila tab short.

If she wants a 10-course trial

of Vikram Yoga, she can have that,

and the Hatha meditation retreat

(unless the swami is seeking new recruits—

then send her to the Buddhist one instead.)

When she comes back, she will tell you

the self is an illusion, life has no point,

and how indifferent she feels

toward that unawakened daughter

and her spoiled family.

That is when you should give her

another dose of ecstasy.

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